A few items of note here...
First, the fork springs support the weight of the bike and rider. It's simple math. At 100kg, you're a fairly large guy - if you have used a suspension calculator like the one at Race Tech (racetech.com) and it suggests a 0.95kg/mm spring rate, then that's what I would use. If the calculator suggests a rate that is between available rate springs, go lighter (round down) for street use.
Second, "harshness" (a subjective term) is a result of the compression damping and has little to do with the springs. As mentioned above, the springs support the sprung weight of the bike and rider and damping controls the rate at which suspension compresses and rebounds. This is what we perceive as ride quality.
Third, we have damping rod forks - they will ALWAYS feel harsh over fast or sharp bumps; they will always be soft (shoot through their travel) during braking and they will always wallow when introduced to a road surface with a "rocking" motion. It's the inherent limitation of the design. As long as you are updating the springs, now would be a very good time to install Race Tech Gold Valve Emulators. The GVE's will have a transformative effect on the ride quality by providing rate-based control of the fork motion.
I have used GVE's on every bike I've owned with conventional forks for the last 25 years (probably 12 bikes) - everything from dirtbikes to custom street bikes - and I have never been disappointed.
Going back to your original question, I'm using 0.85kg/mm fork springs, but I'm only 170 pounds. Using your weight (220 pounds) the racetech calculator suggests a rate of 0.93kg/mm - right in the middle of available rates. Personally I'd use the 0.90kg springs. Not because they will ride better, but because you may not be able to obtain the correct sag settings with the 0.95kg springs.