Alone after 24 years :(

[oldfast007]

So, at this point she has told me she wants a divorce, and that I just don't get it...even though the mixed messages are still occurring, so now I am seeing a therapist for help to let go, there is still some small hope, but I must try and let go. If I am the cause of all her pain (I'm not) I must at least allow that part to go away (allow the divorce to happen) in as loving manner as I can. I did maintain I don't want the divorce so the onus is on her to follow through.

I will be defending my interest and assets and hope the reality of the situation to be an awakening of sorts for her. My kids are still being incredible and growth for me as a good person is progressing well.

I hope and pray that some day we reconcile and grow together but only time will tell...I must now focus on my kids and me. That is easier to say than do for sure(the me part).

My Lord is still leading the way and I will follow...

Thanks all again for the continued prayers and support!

 

[oldfast007]

So i went last night and told her i am letting go...that i am moving back home and i will work with her to see this through together she finally cried and will work with me to see if i can keep the house. She has started to look for apartment and is agreeable to help me financially. So i still am dying inside but i must let her go so she can seek whatever's she's after and hope she wants to someday give it a go back with me. Now its between her and God. I will pray continually for her peace and reconciliation but understand it may not happen. My kids are fully supportive and cant wait for me to move back home. God's grace will guide me.

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[Guitar Man]

Hope it works out for you. Best of luck.

 

[Dresnewtoy]

I'm really impressed by your humility and selflessness. I hope the living arrangement works out and you get some resolution.

Praying for you!

 

[motojoe122]

you are doing a better job of handling it then I did...props to ya!

 

[Baci]

that happened to me after 6 years. Times that by 4 and i might have an idea of how you feel.

Sorry to hear that bro, never easy when the other person decides that.

Time heals all wounds, chin up and just go ride some twisties to help cheer you up.

Saturday I had a friend murdered by her piece of **** bf and then the bastard shot himself. What a shock man. But something about 115 MPH winds help sooth me.....ok maybe not that fast, but then again....

 

[oldfast007]

Need some advice here....SO were down the wire papers get filled this week, I am back home much to my Kids delight and mine, however the future ex is none to happy when she goes to the house after she gets out of work(i am not there) and my son completely ignores her.
Then she get pissed at me. I tell her I will talk with him, but I wonder what does she expect when you torpedo a family, how do I handle this, I really don't want him to disrespect her but on the other hand I totally understand how he feels?? HELP!

P.S this weekend I showed nothing but Love to her, I helped her move all her stuff, took her to the store to get her new bed, and even assembled it for her. After she left I cried endlessly, I am really trying to show her how much I've changed, I did this all out love not malice or spite.

Divorce....... the gift that keeps on taking.

 

[agf]

Man she needs to re build her relationship with her son. All you can say to your boy is' she is still your mum and even tho she isn't in love with your dad she loves you, and she's the only mum you will ever have'.

I'm still learning all this and it's 8 years on. I go to a counsellor today to try and unravel stuff .it's never straight forward.
It sounds like you are trying to do the best in a not so good situation
All the best

 

[motojoe122]

I kept the helping the ex to a minimum, the kids will eventually figure out who they want to live with. Kids see more then grown ups do.

 

[Hazel]

God bless you

so, at this point she has told me she wants a divorce, and that i just don't get it...even though the mixed messages are still occurring, so now i am seeing a therapist for help to let go, there is still some small hope, but i must try and let go. If i am the cause of all her pain (i'm not) i must at least allow that part to go away (allow the divorce to happen) in as loving manner as i can. I did maintain i don't want the divorce so the onus is on her to follow through.

I will be defending my interest and assets and hope the reality of the situation to be an awakening of sorts for her. My kids are still being incredible and growth for me as a good person is progressing well.

I hope and pray that some day we reconcile and grow together but only time will tell...i must now focus on my kids and me. That is easier to say than do for sure(the me part).

My lord is still leading the way and i will follow...

Thanks all again for the continued prayers and support!

 

[oldfast007]

So the ex to be showed up tonight and told me she filed the divorce...I get the house and contents etc she actually didnt rake me over the coals however I am having a lawyer review it before I sign anything...but i gotta say f'n is crazy painful as for whatever reason I still love the woman to death, how crazy is that! The kids are destroyed but we will rise above. The only stickler is I have refinance the house by April or walk away..we'll see. I hope (probably crazily) that down the road we can somehow get back together and heal. Thanks again for all the support and prayers!

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[2006_FZ6]

Hang in there brother, we're here for you!

 

[Lefty]

I went through the same thing 28 years ago and all I can add is your kids are the most important thing. No matter how painful it is with you ex show your love and support for your children is paramount, and it will pay off in spades.
I know it's cliche but life goes on and you may be surprised on how awesome it may turn out to be....

 

[yaminator]

You must have a soul and an ached heart to have posted this to your moto buddies. Wish I could say that there's nothing that a good ride can't help you deal with. (Oh, how it's true tho.) I'm sure many besides me on this forum know just what you are feeling. Number one right now is YOU. Don't over-value what was good, and don't knock yourself down over the bad memories. You will rise up and run again, brother--with even more to offer her or anyone else, for that matter.

 

[The Toecutter]

So the ex to be showed up tonight and told me she filed the divorce...I get the house and contents etc she actually didnt rake me over the coals however I am having a lawyer review it before I sign anything...but i gotta say f'n is crazy painful as for whatever reason I still love the woman to death, how crazy is that! The kids are destroyed but we will rise above. The only stickler is I have refinance the house by April or walk away..we'll see. I hope (probably crazily) that down the road we can somehow get back together and heal. Thanks again for all the support and prayers!

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I'm going Monday to re-finance my home..I ended up getting it too.. I am renting it to my brother though I don't want to live there anymore... have you been dating yet? I have!! :rockon: :rockon: I have been having alot of fun with the new Woman in my life!! get out there and mingle.... Like you I thought my Ex was the only one for me and I found out ...... i was wrong :thumbup::thumbup:

 

[lonesoldier84]

have you been dating yet? get out there and mingle.... Like you I thought my Ex was the only one for me and I found out ...... i was wrong :thumbup::thumbup:

Jesus H. Simpson.

FINALLY.

Welcome to page 3 of this thread. Haha you bastards are only 9 pages late.

Seriously. The healthy way for a man to deal with any recent breakup is to just run, and run, and run. Like a lion freed from a cage.

It is the natural state of man to be free. Not saying you should go whore yourself out to the lowest bidder, but be your 16 year old self. Part of him is still in there somewhere. That retarded idiot who just wants to giggle and piss himself all day.

Go ride your god damned motorcycles and just enjoy your life. Seriously. WTF already. This thread is making me angry. Haha

^The aftermath of a divorce for the male.

Dude, you're the lucky one haha not her. Your stock value is higher than when you got married in some important ways. Her stock value has "sagged".

:BLAA:


Although, to be fair, the old man scrotum is going to be a bit of a hurdle.

 

[oldfast007]

Last update!! I am single!! Done effective 12/02/12, going on a date tonight :BLAA: moving on!!! Thanks to everyone so much for the kind words and advice!!

Next post will be bike related !!!

Eric.

 

[LERecords]

good luck on your date!!!

 

[motojoe122]

Congrats and have a great time on your date! Go with no expectations of anything physical.....Well, you know
Hey, mine was finalized on Apr. 1st, 2009!

 

[Kazza]

Enjoy your date Eric and ALWAYS be a gentleman (we kinda like that )

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