Well, the new ignition switch hasn't come in and I haven't had time to do a full diagnostic program, but it seems like it's back at 100% nonetheless.
A couple days ago I took out the battery to put it on the tender, and in the process noticed two things:
1) The rubber stopper on the (+) lead extender was missing. Yeah, I know--it scared me, too. It was there Sunday, so this must have happened after O'Reilly's tested the battery.
2) The (-) terminal bolt socket was missing altogether, with a VERY weak connection. When I took the battery out Sunday I noticed that the previous owner had connected it with a wide-threaded machine screw, which obviously didn't fit, so I didn't look closer at that time. Now I'm guessing he did that to try and jam the connector tight without a socket. I have no idea why he didn't just use a nut.
3) I should have mentioned this before, but there was a cheap LED fog light wired into the system. I took a closer look because the last time I rode the lights were intermittently shorting, and was shocked at just how jury rigged they were.
The battery was up to 13.8v after a night on the tender. I reinstalled it, fixing all of these things in the process. In an abundance of caution, I completely uninstalled the lead extender, though it's so convenient I'll probably be replacing it soon. I also uninstalled the fog light, which I may or may not reinstall depending on how the replacement LED H4 bulbs I ordered end up performing.
The bike started right up, and the DMM showed good values when I hooked it up the way [MENTION=15974]FinalImpact[/MENTION] showed above. (13s at idle, high 14s when revving above 4k).
The next test was to let it sit overnight, since Sunday after O'Reilly's it had started up great only to be dead Monday morning. But this morning it started right up! Also, the check engine light that had been going on and off hasn't shown up since I went through this list. I didn't get into diagnostic mode to see what the error was, but I strongly suspect it was the inadequate power error. It was usually on at idle or low revs, but went off every time I got on the highway.
Anyway, I'm going to stay cautious (postponing my motorcycle camping trip), and I'm still going to replace the ignition so I can lock the bike for the first time ever, but it looks like it's roadworthy once again. Thanks again, guys.