Rumpole's thread on the Constabulary - with poll.

[Rumpole of the Bailey]

A gentleman is away for a while and comes back to much discussion on the law and its enforcement officers. You think I would have enough of this type of interaction..

Imagine my disgust when I enter a 'lower court' to find a 'chunky' little police woman sitting at the front benches just waiting for me to enter and sit opposite her. Her manner is all, 'look at me, uniform, holster and badges'!!!
I barely grunt a 'morning', then go about my duty of defending some poor cad from her evil, disdainful advances.

Then imagine the policewoman's distress when she finds out I have come well prepared for the case and infact, have been asked by a solicitor to give my opinion on some area of the law the case is affected by. I never take a case where I expect to lose it.

Oh sure , she has done 4 weeks of legal training at the academy and she can shoot a gun. I have 2 degrees, a Masters and well on the way to my Doctorate. Step aside Sally, you are wasting the taxpayers money again this morning.

So friends, this FE situation is one that seems to be a battle the police are winning. Why?
Because with their 4 weeks of legal training, they know they can win a case in court so they just give you the ticket, that simple.

Please feel free to enter my poll.

By the way. Whilst on holidays some years ago I met a babe sunbathing topless on a beach at Noosa. We had a few meals together, a night club or two and she asked to drive me home one evening to my sumptuous holiday villa and I could barely say no! Stopping for gas at some petrol station on the coast , while Miss X was inside paying, I noticed something and it was causing pain to my ancle. Feeling around I found the object was one of those big black Maglite torches, it had moved loose from between the seats when she had almost rolled her car while showing me how fast she could drive along the coast road.

She hadn't told me she was a Vic cop on holidays. I also joined a few dots, in charge manner, how she came on to me at the beach. What was a gentleman to do in this situation???? Goodness, I wonder.

Well, I admit, I wasn't nice to her at all and my behaviour was definitely out of character. But I can say I have definitely F**ked the police!!!
Rumps

 

[Stumbles06]

Never been looked at on the bike, so I must be a Saint :rof:

16 years ago, I got pulled over at midnight on my GPZ 1100, (was a bit noisey), the police fella almost tripped over coming around the car to stop me as I came around the corner onto South Rd.
Middle of winter, I had 2 pairs of gloves, a Balaclava and all the gear on, and he wants to do a Breath test. While I was "blowing in the bag", his partner was looking around the bike. When the B.A.C. came back negative, they looked disappointed, but let me on my way.
Only time I've ever had a copper pull me over on a bike.
The car... Well, that's a different story...lol

:rockon:

 

[macem29]

edit: didn't realize this was in the ozzie forum

 

[Kriswithak]

I got a fine for turning left into a side street from a bus lane, little did I know that the turn was not allowed between 6 and 9 am (it was like 6:05) and the sign that said as much was on the far corner of the turn. Wasn't too happy, but it was only a fine.

I was pulled over by a pretty young female officer once for a breath test, she was very polite and friendly and sent me on my way quick smart since I don't drink when I'm riding.

I did one day when all the traffic lights had gone out in my neighborhood almost run over a cop who stepped out in front of me at a set of lights that where not working, from the side I thought it was just a pedestrian and assumed no one is stupid enough to move in front of amoving vehicle on the main road while traffic is still flowing, luckily I had slowed down since the lights where not working and I wasn't sure if someone from a side street would just try and move out.
He wasn't too happy to say the least, but regardless it was one of the stupidest things I've seen anyone do on the road.

 

[OZXJR]

My last speeding fine was December 23 .......................................1991 !

Now that I have said that I guess I,m due

 

[Kazza]

Sound like you've got a problem with women police, not police themselves.....

 

[jackay]

Well my more recent fine and also the my first was the day I put on those Leo pipes on my bike. My guess is that they were loud enough to hear me coming...

BTW. That's one damn good story. And I definitely be visiting noosa soon LOL!!!

 

[Wolfman]

I always seem to get caught speeding in my car,if i get caught at all! I think it's because in the car i am less conscious of being 5 -10 kilometres over the speed limit, and generally am not as focused as i am when riding the bike!

I had not had a speeding fine on a bike for about 8 years till recently, i got pinged by doing 106km/h in a 100 km/h zone, on my way back from PI with Mikey earlier this year!

Have a couple of funny stories regarding police...even had a very similar experience with a holidaying female Victorian Police officer a couple of years ago myself...met her at the Club i was working at, she asked me to take her "home"! She was hot, i am not, i was single, and i am a man...Could'nt get my keys out of my pocket fast enough!

I only twigged that she was a Police Officer, on the way back to her hotel, after i asked her whether she wanted to share in my herbal cigarette! She then told me that she was a cop, and that not only did she not want to share, but she objected to me firing up at all in her presence!

Anyway, it made the ensuring hour or so, back at the Hotel, a lot more fun, knowing!!!!

The other story is from when i was a dirty, smelly, hippy, Uni Student, who never had any money, but got caught speeding once or twice, and somehow never managed to pay the fine...warrant issued!

Anyway, i knew this, but could not do much about it at the time...as i was povo, and back in those days, they didnt have "Payment arrangements"...

So, one day a cop turns up to the front door, my missus answers the door,. knowing what it was about, and tells the nice police officer, that i am not home....and he knew i was!

Anyway, he leaves, comes back 2 days later, gets the same story...this time he leaves with a very stern warning, that if i didnt sort this out.......

So, fast forward to a day later, It's 8am on a Saturday Morning...i have just got home from work!!! Being a DJ, and me being young and silly, i was pretty worse for wear...Nice Police Officer turns up again! This time i know he is going to want to come in the house...so i jump the back fence, and leg it!

He Goes, but knows i am around...I sneak home, get in the Car, and take my missus to work...drive home an hour later, and as i turn into my street, there is Mr Nice Police Officer SITTING IN WAITING...sirens come on, he pulls in front of me Starsky & Hutch style, and basically rips me out of my car, cuffs me, shouts to my housemate to get the car off the road, and takes me to the lock up!!!!

I can tell you now, he was pi$$ed!

We get to the station, he tells me i am gonna be there for the whole weekend, etc...till we could set a court date on the monday...

At this point, i am sorta worried, as i had 2 more gigs that weekend, and without them,i had no chance of paying the rent!

I get one phone call...i ring my boss! "Hey dude, if you want me to work tonight, can you come to the Police Station, and get me out???"

His response....Laughed his guts out for a bit, and told me to sit tight...

Anyway, he turns up, pays the oustanding amount of money on the warrant, and i go home...all in under 2 hours!

That is the one and only time i have ever been "locked up", and i hope it's the last...it's 21 years since this happened, but i will never forget the look on the cops face when he knew he had his man!

And he was a nice cop, an older one, who even though he wanted to strangle me by the time he got me, he never once treated me like a second class citizen, he only offered, good ol fashioned advice to a headstrong young man...it worked!

I pay my fines these days!

:thumbup:

 

[Rumpole of the Bailey]

I have had to show Wolfmans article to my clerk and she is still laughing:
1. because I am in this forum
2. because your decision to leave home via the back fence comes up in court a lot with sometimes hilarious outcomes eg big dog on other side etc.

Also,
3. sharing a bunger with a cop.

My final word on traffic cops from a famous quote by one Les Norton;
'Never get in a fight with a pig.
You both end up getting covered in sh*t and the pig likes it!'